Navigating the unknown in community
By Laura Storm
This blog is written to give a deep insight into how the Regenerators community collectively held space for a co-created, co-held gathering at Selgars, UK on August 30 - September 3, 2023. It’s written for our brothers and sisters who couldn’t be there and for all who are curious about how we self-organised a transforming retreat without experts or lead-facilitators. It gives you insight into the process, the business model but also a personal insight into my fears and excitement around this. Radical honesty and transparency are key words for the regenerative era.
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I’ve been back home for a week now after spending four days with amazing human beings who are fellow travellers on the Regenerative Leadership Journey. I sense I’m a little lost for words when describing what we all just went through but I think it’s important it reaches people beyond those that gathered so here’s my best attempt to invite you into the experience.
First, let’s begin at the start, or at least trace back a little.
I’ve dreamed of a growing community of regenerators (people who want to align with life) for many many years, and this was my dream when the organisation Regenerators was launched almost six years ago. A community where people could come together, weave and work together, share stories and learnings, and grow a nourished ecosystem together that would create powerful and nourishing ripples. The time of the lone wolf is over and we must gather in community, develop nourishing relationship that can strengthen the carrying capacity of the regenerative movement.
It was my hope with the year-long journeys that people would form strong bonds in a safe held space where I could offer some of my ideas within regenerative leadership and also invite in pioneers from the field to ensure diversity in teachings, perspectives and language. So I’ve done that for a few years now and it’s been amazing. Yet I’ve deeply wanted to take this further and explore what would happen if we went from a space held by me (and this year also the wonderful community nurturer Emily Johnsson) into a space we all held together. From regenerative words to regenerative being and doing. Practising and experimenting together.
I believe we need deep transformative relationships and community that isn’t superficial, but where a deeper sense of belonging to your fellow journey travellers is present. I have such a deep desire to dismantle the increasing use of expert-persona built around me and others in the regenerative space. A desire to not build ego-driven castles of “thought leadership” with disciples but truly walk the path together. Once you put yourself or others on a pedestal you give energy to the story of separation. Yes, we can play different roles – honouring our differences is key to a healthy ecosystems. And yes, having movement spokes-people can serve a purpose. But there’s danger in the growing celebration of a few “experts” in the regenerative field, especially as most are white, most are men, I fear we are in the process of repeating history (more on that another time – back to our gathering).
I dreamed of spaces full of play, experiments, explorations into the unknown where we could grow and heal together. Practice emergence, dancing in the liminal space, nourishing the field of potential and ourselves.
So the idea was: How about we invite people from the journey on such an exploration? Not as a product/retreat we would sell, not a shiny polished offering but a space for practising regenerative ways of being and leading. Not held, designed or facilitated by one or two people but truly by the group in an emergent way. All practising sensing and responding, self-leadership, self-awareness, holding the field of potential together instead of waiting for the teacher’s permission or approval. Liberation, practice, becoming.
Collectively between the group of 40 people we succeeded in creating nothing short of magic. That’s what it felt like to me at least. During those days I was often reminded of Charles Eistenstein’s book title: The more beautiful world our hearts know is possible. Because this experience has felt like we co-created a more beautiful world that came from our beating, courageous hearts. I have never in my life experienced anything like this. It was days of “pinch me” moments, people transforming, surrendering and tapping into that pure frequency of heart energy.
HOW DID WE MAKE IT HAPPEN?
I booked the place and the dates in January at my friend Antons magical space Selgars and then asked the community if anyone was up for this experiment of a ‘gathering of emergence’. Charlie Felgate, a former Decathlon vision lead and 2022 journey traveller, immediately put his hand up (hat tip to Charlie - wouldn’t had happened unless you had raised your hand) and then a process of community weaving slowly started.
Key word here is slowly as one of our interesting observations was that despite the initial excitement in the community no one signed up in the first few months. We’re not sure why but there was a slight worry about the open canvas of co-creation – the fear of surrendering completely to a space no one person holds but is co-held and co-designed. Questions like “which experts will facilitate sessions for us?” “What will the agenda be like?” “What’s the main theme?”, “What is the focus of the gathering?” were raised. And confusion when the answers were: “we don’t know”, “no-one” and “we will explore together”. Interesting observations right? We like the idea of an emergent space in theory but there is also fear or nervousness around it, this collective fear of navigating the unknown, and surrendering, letting go of control. Fascinating.
I was very keen on not stepping in and taking over the design (although I was sometimes tempted as I love to design processes:-)). I didn’t want to book any “experts” to come in and teach. And I did not want to run sessions myself and let my sessions be a focus point or centre of gravity. It would defeat the whole purpose. I was very keen on this gathering being held by the amazing people in the Regenerators community because what we need in the world is to experiment together, stepping up individually and collectively and practice courage to navigate the liminal space together. For the regenerative transition to happen we must all realise we each have unique and potent medicine, skills and talents to offer this regenerative transformation – it is not dependent on so-called experts to lead the way from their pedestals or “expert-position”. We all need to step up.
So Charlie got together a handful of people from the journey community (people from the 2022 + 2023 cohorts) who were keen on being part of this experiment that started to list and brainstorm potential themes that people would love to dive deeper into. We sent out a survey as well to all interested in the gathering to share their desires for such a coming together. Majken Bülow (former Interface Communications Director) a 2023 journey traveller took it upon herself to sense into the answers to see if there was a pattern of key themes emerging.
Four interesting topics were chosen and served as our anchors and then around these sessions we created plenty of open space to allow the field to flourish with what felt alive when we were there, in the moment, sensing-and-responding. The four topics for the four anchor sessions were: 1) Money in a regenerative era 2) The new regenerative narrative 3) unlearning and 4) Learning from others.
We kept repeating in emails and in virtual prep meetings that this is not a shiny polished retreat experience. It’s a messy co-creation.
“Come to the edge, she said”.
"We can't, we're afraid!" we responded.
Yet she continued to hold the vision.
And then.
One by one, bravely, siblings in the Regenerators community ecosystem raised their hands to lightly begin dancing together weaving the rootsystem for the emergence of our gathering.
This was an experiment: a profound invitation to unlearn outdated subconscious structures.
An invitation to remove masks & leave behind well-rehearsed roles.
Turning on its head the notion of a ‘retreat’ being where we show up with the expectation to be served or even ‘saved’.
Words by Emily Johnsson, co-facilitator and community nurturer of the 2023 Regenerative Leadership Journey cohort
Slowly but with such a potent force, people stepped up, offered ideas and took ownership of our gathering. We had created a collective energetic vortex that could carry us through the physical gathering. Some signed up for working together on prepping our anchor sessions, others put their hand up to hold the space for yin-style morning flow sessions, meditation, dancing, grounding. Others signed up for co-creating a co-cooking experience. And so the skeleton of the emergent programme was created.
The emergent programme flow that guided our days.
THE TENSION AND FEAR OF STEPPING INTO THE UNKNOWN
In our last two virtual prep calls Charlie and I thought we would mainly talk about practicalities and logistical details as the anchor points were ready, the flow was loosely designed (with plenty of space for on-site emergence), chefs were booked, room allocations were done but in the last two calls there was tension in the field.
There was an equal amount of excitement and fear, and a sense of nervousness. When we held these emotions it was clear that almost everyone to varying degrees was feeling the discomfort of letting go and entering uncharted territories. “I feel nervous” was said by many and we held that together, created space for it in a way where we unleashed the tension together.
“Because this was a co-created event, none of us knew what to expect. We had left some slots for spontaneous activity so our ‘left brains’ were nervous around the agenda prior to the gathering” (Ish, participant shared on her LinkedIn)
For the months leading up to the gathering I had only felt excitement but in the week leading up to the retreat I started to feel uncomfortable and a little nervous. I shared this with Charlie, my wingman in this endeavour who was a lot more relaxed and generally amazing at going with the flow leading up to our gathering. Sometimes to a for me slightly worrying degree and I think I said something like “for the feminine to surrender and let go (creativity, sense of belonging, co-creation) she needs to feel held by the masculine” (the structure, the feeling that all important things are taken care of). Which is true and important to bear in mind in all co-creations but we had a great core team of Anton, Majken, Joy, Charlie and myself who all brought different qualities and enough of a perfect balance between the masculine and the feminine.
For me personally in the last week leading up to our gathering I sensed that I was really the only one in our gathering and core group that had a lot to lose and it triggered fear and loneliness. For everyone else, if this experiment didnt work they could shrug it off and continue as nothing had happened but for me this was different:
Will I be judged if things go wrong? Will I be shamed in public?
Will people be disappointed that they’re not getting a “Masterclass in Regenerative Leadership” by me or that I’m not being the main spaceholder?
How will it feel for me to let go fully? There is a certain degree of hiding behind the role as facilitator that can be difficult to shed. It required a new level of intimacy and vulnerability from me.
Can I be in community? Truly? Or do I actually feel safer being the lone wolf?
Will I be overwhelmed? As a highly sensitive introvert being around 40 people for four days felt like a lot. Could I handle that?
What if I hate it and want to leave?
Will me stepping back be seen as lack of skill and incompetence?
What if nothing happens and people look towards me? What if they don’t step up?
I find it really interesting that me surrendering these fears helped create something far more powerful than any individual could ever have done alone. Create the space for emergence albeit how scary and triggering it may be for your ego to let go, is so incredibly important in the times we are navigating. Hero leadership is a thing of the past.
THE PHYSICAL COMING TOGETHER
I arrived the evening before the main gathering started. Ahead of my arrival a self-appointed arrival team had gathered at Selgars, our amazing venue where their main steward Anton Chernikov had been a close partner to Charlie and I from the beginning. Selgars weren’t just our venue – they were a partner and participant. The arrival team wanted to come early to welcome in people, give them a tour, make a cup of tea and help everyone settle in. I arrived at 10pm and got picked up by Chris, a journey traveller from the 2023 group, who sent me a text if I wanted to get a ride from the bus station instead of a cab. I noticed how a small gesture like that made me feel relieved and held; that instead of being the one in charge, the one with all the answers, it already felt like a superorganism working seamlessly together for the benefit of the whole.
On the morning of the first day, before everyone arrived I felt a little tense. Will this experiment work? I had breakfast with four journey travellers and we talked through the opening. I had been away for six weeks offline leading up to the gathering and Charlie had asked me to facilitate the opening session so I could help set the scene and reiterate the values and intention of this gathering. But during breakfast Chris suggested: “How about you don’t facilitate the opening?”. In my mind I had an equal amount of “oh that would be so wonderful” and “but what if whoever does it instead of me doesn’t do it as I would and don’t remind people of x, y, z” :-).
But it was just the perfect beginning to really help reiterate that this is NOT my gathering – it’s ours. And I don’t have to hold this. The perfect kickstart to four days of magic, really.
Seeing how people healed and transformed in front of me was medicine to my soul. Some arrived from the corporate world quite sceptical on the first night as we gathered around the fire for an opening ceremony.
As Ish describes in her Linkedin post: “we all witnessed the beauty of emergence and the dance between convergence and divergence. An agreement of trust was discussed and shared at the beginning of the retreat which played an important role in ensuring that everyone felt safe and could bring their authentic self. There was no judgement, unsolicited advice, sales pitches or ulterior motives. Only authentic sharing, honest and open communication amongst all. We arrived as strangers and left as family (the kind you cannot wait to see and hug again).”
For me personally I LOVED the whole experience. I absolutely loved it. It was like taking a long bath in everything I dream of for the future. It truly felt like we co-created a more beautiful world our hearts know is possible. Letting go and surrendering felt so incredibly healing. I held the first fire circle and then the container for the half day of silence but beside that I was just enjoying the richness and the magic.
There were coaching sessions offered and 1-1 mentoring offered by those who were trained coaches, circle sharings around different topics (being the lone wolf for example), workshops in plant-painting, nature walks with a biologist among the group, breathwork, rituals integrated in design-thinking and brainstorming session around “how to regenerate an island”, “regenerative politics”, and so much more. Emily held a guided inner-journey on the themes of saying yes to rest & receiving life more fully, through a healing Temple of Rest session one evening, and a group of six offered to design a powerful closing ceremony on the final night.
“There were moments of brave vulnerability as voiced fears of feeling like outsiders, not belonging, amongst lone wolves were named, witnessed and held as relationships rooted in deep respect strengthened.” Simon Jones, participant
“I experienced a level of caring, deep intimacy and honest sharing that I have rarely seen in other communities that meet for the first time.” Philippe Birker, participant
“Founded in the logic of life, with true belonging and absolute inclusion – no ego trips or posturing, but strong backs, soft fronts and fierce hearts! In agreement to hold each other safe and whole like family does.” Tatjana Harttung, participant
It gave me goosebumps to witness this collective unfolding, the generosity and the becoming.
Photos above are taken by: 1) myself, 2) Ruth Davey, Look Again, 3) Anton Chernikov, 4) Morgan
THE BUSINESS MODEL BEHIND OUR GATHERING
In the name of transparency I wanted to share the business model around this particular gathering. I feel strongly about increasing transparency around our business models and in general that money shouldn't hide in the shadows (this will be our theme for Regenerators October newsletter - so watch out for that).
So here’s the main elements:
1) We had four different price levels ranging from €150 - €600 to allow as many as possible the opportunity to come
2) We paid the venue, the chefs (we also cooked ourselves but four meals were made by chefs) and materials but no one from the planning team or Regenerators took out a salary and also paid their own transportation.
3) The profit generated (€2000) was channelled onwards to our brother Konkankoh from African Way who had been on the journey in 2022 and is a wise elder, wisdom keeper and permaculture expert with a passion for teaching the next generation how to live in alignment with nature.
Let me be clear around element 2): I don’t think it’s shameful in any way to get paid for facilitating events (I’m a strong advocate for change makers charging fairly for their work so they can let go of the struggle - we need money in the hands of genuine change makers!) but I think part of the reason the energy around this particular gathering felt so special was that everyone could sense this wasn’t a business and that we had all invested to be there. I see these types of gatherings as something the revenue from my keynotes and courses on Regenerators Academy can help make possible for me to attend but my dream is also that those who attended our gathering can now hold space for similar gatherings around the world where I’m not needed. It’s part of a nourished business ecosystem based on reciprocal energetic flows (I write more about this here).
I’m aware that it’s a privilege for all of us who were at this gathering. I’m conscious that not all have this opportunity. I’m also aware that flying around for these types of gatherings is not the answer. But being in community is. Letting go, trying, experimenting and healing in community is the answer when reclaiming all that we have lost through the journey of separation. I want to spread the learnings from a gathering like this because we need more of these types of events in our local communities. We need to sing from rooftops that there is a better way and we need to find our siblings where we are. I hope this gathering will continue to generate regenerative ripples.
Photos above are taken by: Ruth Davey, Look Again,
THE INGREDIENTS THAT MADE THIS GATHERING SPECIAL
I don’t really believe in recipes for this sort of thing but I thought it helpful to share some of the elements which I think made this gathering so special:
We were already a virtual community as all had been on the same learning journey into Regenerative Leadership. The soil - our shared foundation - had been nourished and cultivated. This meant that we didn’t have to “waste” time building alignment around regeneration – it was something all participants felt passionate about and had gone through key modules covering this already.
It was co-created many months in advance so we didn’t just rock up and start weaving together. We had spent months building our collective carrying capacity.
Noone was in charge but there was a core group of enablers that sensed and responded together in the months leading up to our gathering: Anton (as the guardian of the space we gathered on), Charlie, Majken (helped sense into the key themes for this gathering), Joy (held open space for the morning sessions) and myself. We didn’t make any decisions or took the lead on anything but we helped each other sense and respond leading up to the gathering. During the gathering we collectively did the sensing-and-responding.
It was not about learning something from “experts” but rather being and weaving based on the principles of life we had been through in the journey. It was like living regeneration rather than talking about it. People could make their own connections to the course content without it being force-fed. We were dancing together like starlings in the sky.
Equal amount of doing and being, masculine and feminine, inner and outer, left-brain hemisphere and right brain hemisphere. Navigating opposites is something we go into again and again in the journey and here it was manifested and embodied.
I got out of the way. This is a very big and important one and if I was only allowed to list one reason this would be it.
The wonderful humans who gathered from 4 continents (although majority from europe). Photo: Morgan
We held space for becoming and practising regeneration rather than talking about it, intellectualising it. We held each other, laughed, cried and danced together. Collectively we activated courage and love and now a week after people are sharing the powerful ripples they are generating in their communities. Everyone stepped up in a way aligned with their essence and calling. Everyone was equally valued and welcome. It felt like everyone could deeply exhale and let go of any masks which can be hard when you gather with 40 people you have never met before.
Samar who joined us from Kuwait shares about this beautifully: “At Selgars, we dropped all expectations, competitiveness, comparisons, performances, and pretentiousness.. We surrendered the need for rigid structures and frameworks. We softly and gently held our own brushes to the empty canvas of the gathering and applied brush strokes aligned with the collective being that was emerging minute by minute.. we lived, witnessed, and fully embodied the magnificent creation that was evolving as it was generated.
This “work” is life affirming and invigorating.. a vital element of the health and well-being of all humans and of the ecosystem we all inhabit.
And we are forever deeply transmuted by it and with it.”
In our final ceremonial fire circle we spoke our intentions for the ripples we wanted to create into an acorn to plant when we got back home. There’s a strong felt sense in the community that this gathering was not just a nice experience but it has infused all with greater courage. Courage, radical authenticity and honesty are key ingredients to mobilize the masses into the regenerative era and we deeply deeply need community to do this. It was shared by many around the fire on the last evening that this group felt like family. Like a wolfpack of lonely wolves that had come together to infuse each other with courage and activate hope and a deep sense of belonging.
This, to me, is the most meaningful work we can do.
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Two lovely participants made the initiative to put envelopes with all our names on so we could all leave our gathering with an envelope of handwritten love notes.
You can read fellow journey travellers experience following the links below: